Lessons Learned

This past year and a half has been one of revelation, growth, reflection and at times revolution.  During this time I have done a lot of introspection and change.  Here a few things that resonate with me as I prepare to enter 2012 with expectation of nothing but greatness and resolution!

1. Forgiveness ain't easy but it is necessary.  (Remember, what would Jesus do?)  Forgiveness is not for the other person, it is for YOU.  It is one of the best gifts you can give yourself.  Forgive yourself AND forgive others.   Forgiveness opens doors that resentment and bitterness slam shut.   
2. Resilience and Prayer are essential for traveling through life's trials, tribulations and sometimes tragedies.
3. Giving up is NOT an option.  You are stronger than you think---dig deep.  
4. You are what you think and say you are.  Words have POWER.  
5. No one is in charge of your joy and happiness but YOU.  Find joy and happiness in yourself.   Look for the silver lining in all gray clouds.  If you look hard enough, you will find it.
6. Be content, in all situations, while you are moving toward change.  You will not always like a particular situation, but remember, there is a reason for everything.  
7. Count your blessings.  You can't complain when you are counting your blessings.
8. Lead by example.  Walk the walk and Practice what you Preach.
9. Practice random acts of kindness.
10. I am not my hair.  Beauty exudes from within and the exterior things are just bling.
11. Seek to encourage, uplift and inspire others.
12. Treat yourself (body & mind) like it is Golden.  Do not abuse your body, or let anyone else abuse your body or your mental well-being.  Exercise, eat right, nourish your body and soul.  Input positivity into your mind.  Read daily affirmations or devotions.  Get a personal positive mantra.   
13. Do not be afraid to pray for others in need---even if you do not know them.    
14. Remember the divine order for things: God, Family, Everything else.

 What are your lessons learned?

Why Wait?

What are you waiting for?  I always joke that I'm waiting to exhale....  There are times in life when we have to wait--in line at the grocery store, in traffic, in the waiting room at the doctor's office,  at a red light, just to name a few.  These are examples of times when we have no control over the "wait".  There are numerous other things in life that we do have control over and we still wait.  One that comes immediately to mind is the majority of women do not use their fine china very often.  We WAIT for a special occasion or holiday.  We WAIT until our children are gone and grown to pursue our interests; or in some cases we WAIT for our husbands to give us the green light for something.  We WAIT until Monday to start a diet or exercise plan.   We constantly put things on a "waiting list".  A large amount of people don't live to the fullest or live a great and fulfilled life.  People focus on what is not working, what is not happening or complain about all the wrongs of life.  People WAIT until the sun, the moon and the stars line up and their bank accounts are overflowing to live fully or to be happy!  Most people do not show or share their expressions of love until it is to late.  We WAIT.  I have two childhood friends that I have talked to within the past two days....One had a serious car accident that could have ended his life in the matter of minutes and the other, she needs a heart transplant.  Both are in their early forties.  Both are looking at life very differently.  They are not WAITING to live anymore, they know all too well, that tomorrow is not promised... They have made a command decision to live more, complain less; live fully.  I would like to encourage everyone to stop waiting to live and live fully now.  Everyone's definition is and will be different of what a full, great or fulfilled life is.  Yesterday, I answered this question:  What is your definition of a great life?  I wrote my definition down and I will reflect on it daily to remind myself and keep me accountable to how I want to live a great life.  I recommend you do the same.  I want a full life now, no more waiting.  I'm dusting off my fine china!  I am making a decision that I do not want to live with my goals, dreams, interests and aspirations on the "waiting list".   Think about it....What are you waiting for?

What have you considered.....

After seeing "For Colored Girls", I started thinking, what do people really consider when the chips are down, they are disappointed, disgusted, disenchanted or downright depressed.  We all have issues, baggage, situations, and challenges that we deal with.  They can be simple or complex.  They can be easy to solve or downright near impossible.  They can make us want to buckle, bend or collapse under the pressure or at times they might make us consider giving up....At some point when we are "considering" what to do, we should stop and pray.  This will stop any immediate emotional or physical decisions or outbursts.  Yes, I said physical, (I'm keeping it real....)  When we stop and pray it allows God to intervene in the situation and will help us make a Godly decision.  Next, we need to adopt a mantra that will get us through.  Do you have a mantra that will get you through a situation.  Do you have a phrase, a Proverb, a saying; something that your Grandmother or Mother told you, that you can repeat in your head to "snap"  you out of what you were considering....Prayer coupled with positive thinking/positive phrases can help pull us through.  I strongly believe in mind over matter (I started to adopt this 12 years ago--when I delivered a 9.6 pound son with no drugs.)  Positive self talk and positive internal or external messages are essential.  You are what you think.  Even if your situation doesn't appear positive and you don't like what is happening, you can have a positive outlook on it.  Look deep within.  Know there is a reason for everything and a lesson to be learned.   There is always victory after a battle.  You have to fight to win.  Let me encourage you, keep fighting--victory is ahead.  Most importantly, tell yourself that giving up is NOT an option.